Monthly Archives: September 2011

wow, so as a mom, i get to carry a baby for 9 months, which changes you. morning sickenss, changes you. have a baby, redefine myself as a mom, redefine myself as a partner, raise a child to school age, send said child to school for 6hrs a day, figure out what to with my new 6 hrs a day, remind myself of who i was before all of this and then redefine myself again, all that changes you…enter momlife crisis.

as i hang out on the playground chatting with my newfound kindergarten moms, i am realizing that i am not the only one, trying to figure out how to figure it all out.  i know that a career change is in order because school takes up a lot of time and shooting weddings (which mostly happens on weekends) is not where i want to be while my family is doing something else. but what do i do? i am trying to be more intentional and slow this time around, “choosing” what i want to be when i grow up.  i know that i am fortunate enough to have a supportive partner who wouldn’t mind me basking in the sun reading books for the next several months to figure some things out, but i also don’t want to feel guilty about not doing anything. and yes, i am still doing the brunt of the housekeeping, packing lunches, getting to and from school but i know that that is not enough for me to feel whole. and then this gem of a video above found its way to me via the interwebs and it has got me thinking (a ton) on how vunerable i actually am in my own life. moms are suppose to be this powerhouse, do all. be all. end all. pretend all, if all else fails. but i am finding more empowerment in the truth of it all, being authentic. i know that women put a lot of pressure on themselves to be (fill in the blank) and now i am seeing the pressures of being the “cool” mom at school; will i volunteer enough, is my sweater vintage enough, should i be wearing cute hunter wellies, can i make the best vegan, gluten free, nut free, fat free, sugar free cupcakes the world has ever known? whatever….is it enough? am i enough? i am i worthy enough to be flawed + imperfect + survive? the answer is, ‘yes’ but the process has just begun.

so if you’re wondering what i will be doing with my time now that miss beans is in school and i won’t be internet-ing, it’ll be a lot of soul searching. in end i  hope to come out with a new sense of freedom that i have yet to discover, which i will pass down to lucy, so, (if/when) her children go off to school, she can forgo all this and just have a midweek mimosa without feeling guily, cause lord knows mama could use a cocktail!

juice cleanse, check. house purge, check. mind cleanse…..then i got thinking.
i was thinking about how when i go on vacation i never feel the void of social networking or blogs. i don’t need to know what my friends are eating or who they are with or what their kid said that day. don’t get me wrong, i love my friends, i find them interesting and want to hang out with them and get to know them in ways that 140 characters won’t allow. that being said, i thought it would be a nice challenge to go on a social media/internet cleanse. the fall air is breezing through, i have endless things i can create + my yard could use a little attention and i don’t need to spend endless hours getting inspired by what other people are doing and then not doing any of those wonderful things myself. think of the time i would save not pinning things or svppling things or reading about other people’s lives. i could just live my own life, in real life. so i am seeing who wants to go in on this with me? i am starting october 1st and shooting to reenter the internet world come the new year. i won’t be updating my status or sending out tweets or reading other peoples’ blogs. i will however continue documenting life here at workhouse + updating my photography blog. any snail mail, phone calls, coffee dates will all be accepted + welcomed.

(if my mom where a hipster, this is what she would look like)

today is my mom’s birthday. she will, in fact, be celebrating for the next month and a half considering how many friends she has + how they all want to take her out to eat or feed her cake. she’s just that kind of a gal. she really surprises me sometimes, like being able to make a call on skype or setting up her own facebook account or traveling through her journey with cancer.  she is one tough cookie who reminds us all that you’re never too old to play a practical joke on someone or to make friends with people half or twice your age. she is has a full heart. today she is enjoying a spa day and tomorrow her friends are throwing her a party. we send her the most magical wishes ever + here’s to many years to come! we love you! happy birthday! xo. desdavelucy